I feel like I want to dig a very big hole, fill it with chocolate and pillows, and hide there forever.

Which is really the worst thing to do at the moment, when we should be all up up up and away and doing things and creating our futures. I must be the most lethargic person under 30 in the whole wide world. Sometimes I feel like I literally walk slower than the rest of the world.

I need someone to give me a slap, or threaten to fire me from my job... or something drastic. Except, you can never quite get fired from spiritual practice. You just got to shut up and get on with it, stop with the moaning and all that.

I do feel like my writing's going a bit to shit. Sometimes I can't even speak properly anymore and I've started to make up words that don't exist. Sharon looks at me like I'm mad and then falls off her beanbag laughing at my dreadful Engrish.

They should customise the Refuge vows for me. There's an 11th one - to write a paragraph of something-not-work-related every day, if not you get the karma of a pock-marked face for the next 15 lifetimes. It'll be the only thing to get me moving, because for an aspiring writer, I sure as hell am a lazy, unmotivated one.